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Movie Summary  Movie: The Sword And The Dragon:  The film's title seems arbitrary. Might as well be "The sword and the dragon and the magic dew and lnvincor the rock man and the magic horse and the Wind Demon and the mountain of men and the very intricate plan and the pants and the magic tablecloth and the big huge envoy" and whatever. A lot goes on. Essentially: Ilya Mourometz, a thick, hairy man in a land full of same, is inheritor of the magic sword of mythical hero lnvincor. He's a country bumpkin, and his legs don't work, but some magic dew cures his legs and he goes on to defeat the Tugar hordes and reunite with his captured wife and boneheaded son. — Paul Chaplin Host Segments  Prologue:  Indulging Tom, Crow, and Mike agree to play Dungeons and Dragons. "You are walking on a Trimilidifadian footbridge when you run across a fourth-level Balrog. What do you do?" They really don't know or care.  Segment 1:  The Mads, organizing comic books, get a surprise visit from two new neighbors, Bridget and Mary Jo. They panic and ask for the SOL's help in providing entertainment, because they might be on a date. The SOL performs Crow's satirical revue, "supercali-fragilistic-expialawacky!" "Beep beep-honk honk-government gridlock!"  Segment 2:  Mike, Crow, and Servo dramatize a Sven and Ole joke, in ponderous Swedish-movie style. It takes a while.  Segment 3:  Gypsy sings like Ilya's wife in the movie, as Mike and the others pretend to be hippety-hoppety wood-land creatures.  Segment 4:  Ilya Mourometz visits; he's now a waiter at the International Pancake House. Still hotheaded, he explodes at Crow's request for ham.  Segment 5:  Gypsy's review of the satirical revue pans everybody but Mike. "Tom Servo...bounded on stage shrieking his lines shrill as a fishwife." The Mads, all cooky after their "date," panic when the phone rings: maybe it's the women!!  Stinger:  The Wind Demon gets knocked out of a tree. Reflections Our lngmar Bergman-esque treatment of the Sven and Ole joke lasts for a full four minutes and twenty-one seconds. Our third Aleksandr Ptushko film, the last in the MST Russo-Finnish troika. As always, in vivid Sovcolor. The Tugar (Cugar?) hordes, most of whom walk everywhere, appear to be Asian; the beefy people of Ilya Mourometz are Finnish or something. So in order to plunder, the Tugars walk all the way from Asia to Finland, which has gotta be quite a walk. (Maybe they had sponsors and were raising money for some Asian cause.) The guy who plays Alexi, one of Ilya's hairy friends, plays Sinbad in experiment 0505 - The Magic Voyage Of Sinbad. Both films feature some really great sets and puppets. The Wind Demon, with his creepy features and huge cheeks, is a lot of fun. The vast northern settings and massive white castles are gorgeous. Nonetheless, the movie is confusing as heck. Other than "Joseph Harris & Sig Shore Present," there are no credits in this movie. — Paul Chaplin