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Movie: Girls Town:
A star-studded cast: Mel Torme! Elinor Donahue! Mamie Van Doren!
Ray Anthony! Paul Anka! Dick Contino! The Platters! Sheilah
Graham, Charlie Chaplin, Jr., Harold Lloyd, Jr.! Mamie plays
Silver Morgan, a top-heavy delinquent whose sister (Elinor
Donahue from Father Knows Best) pushes an attacker off a cliff.
A series of misunderstandings results in Silver packed off to
Girls Town, a Catholic minimum security convent. Soon we learn
that inside Silver's huge chest there beats a good heart. She
even helps save Serafina, who is obsessed with Paul Anka, who
also has a good heart. Mel Torme does not have a good heart, so
he kidnaps Silver's sister with the intent of getting her a job
in Mexico. Silver, Paul, and some rock-hard nuns save sis and
beat the crap out of Mel, which looks pretty easy to do.
— Paul Chaplin
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Prologue:
Mike and the Robots must prepare a party for a big announcement
Forrester has planned. Crow's in charge of music. He hires the
Power Steves, who show up in the Hexfield and play "Lady of
Spain."
Segment 1:
Forrester holds a press conference, announcing the Umbilicus!
It's a tether connecting Deep 13 to the SOL, and it's a fairly
major achievement, truth be told. Specifically, it connects to
Gypsy, who's upset at being attached to Deep 13.
Segment 2:
Owing to the presence of Mel Torme, Servo scats until Mike and
Crow, are sick of it. They're about to launch him in a makeshift
rocket, but "commercial" sign intervenes.
Segment 3:
Mike institutes an "honor system" on the SOL, leaving the candy
out; the 'Bots must promise to take only one piece per day,
Servo has no honor. He gains twelve pounds during the segment.
Segment 4:
Mike, Crow, and Servo sketch the woman of the future. Servo: "I
think in the future, women will adorn themselves with Mexican
tile." Crow: "In the future, women will have Cadillac's patented
North Star System!"
Segment 5:
The 'Bots and Mike throw a pie down the Umbilicus straight into
Forrester's face.
Stinger:
Silver's eroded aunt in an upstairs window, shouting.
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Now that I think about it, I'm not sure
that Ray Anthony is a famous person, like almost everybody else
in this movie. In his role as a bread truck driver he comes
across as famous, and "Ray Anthony" is kind of a famous-type
name. Sounds good. So I guess he's famous, but maybe not. Have I
ever heard of him? I can't be sure.
In addition to her role as
Betty ("Princess") on Father Knows Best, Elinor Donahue played
Ellie, Andy's first girlfriend, on The Andy Griffith Show. She's
hot in this movie, and she was hot as Andy's girlfriend too. In
fact, she was way preferable, in my opinion, to Andy's last
girlfriend and ultimate wife, Helen Crump. Helen was moralistic
and uptight, and her cold presence came to dominate that show,
especially after Barney left. I shudder to think what happened
to poor Opie once Helen assumed total control. (You get the
wrong mother, boy, and you're in trouble.)
Dick Contino is in
this, and his pants are hiked just as high as in experiment
0307 - Daddy - O. I wonder if anyone ever mentioned it to him, quietly,
between scenes, as a friend. I mean we all assume that he wanted
his pants that high, but maybe it was a problem. Maybe poor Dick
had creeping pants.
— Paul Chaplin
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